The Reality™ Institute

Now, we all know that Beetle Bailey is as sharp today as it was 100 years ago when the strip began as a light-hearted satire of the US’s occupation of the Dominican Republic. Since then, the strip has never shied away from controversial topics, as in recent years when it’s tackled sensitive issues ranging from disillusionment in the Iraq War, to the fact that one of the characters is an Oriental.

But every now and then, the strip slips. Take this recent one, for example. There are a few problems. First, Miss Buxley has been General Halftrack’s assistant for more than half a century, so it seems a little cruel that she should remind him of his wife’s barrenness by casually asking about his childlessness. But most confusing are the expressions that she and General Halftrack make in response to the unnamed lesbian soldier’s comment. Ok, what she said was creepy- but they both look horrified. She must have said something so awful it made halftrack swallow his false teeth.

So I think clearly there was another script to this strip. Maybe it was too controversial, or to risky- but at the last minute, it had to be substituted for this weak joke. So what was the original script? Or can anyone think of something for fitting?

You can either write it in as a comment below, or if you’re feeling industrious, type it into the blank strip provided.

‘Funnies’ caps on!